The World's Worst All-in-One
Ghost Hunting Tool
"A PARODY DESIGNED AND BUILT FOR GHOST HUNTERS"
DISCOVER & RECORD PARANORMAL EVENTS
As Easy as Turning a Knob
THEN TRYING TO PUT IT BACK ON WITH FRUSTRATION
These logos are from reviewers that have never seen a real product.
All the Equipment You Want
In One Device...
Choose which frequencies to listen to:
Staticy/StaticPlus/ThatHurtsMyEars. GhostArc records the
other frequencies and your voice with 'Reverse-a-mode'.
Use the high-sensitivity microphones
to start recording at 6Hz, apparently. We don't really know. But the factory says it is 'much audible by human ear.' So, it must be really good.
Do you like our funny PacMan ghost icon? Funny right? That takes me back. Womp, womp, womp. Oh, this was supposed to be something about traps. Right. Umm. Just go watch Ghostbusters and you'll get it.
Detect electromagnetic changes and
read values on the... blah blah blah. Hey, this icon looks like a kid playing Xbox. You see that now, right?
Temp & Pressure
Record temperature and pressure
changes using shielded sensors. Wait. "Yo, Antonio! Did we put shielding in this thing? - No?"
Okay, forget I mentioned shielding.
Import to your PC data collected with GhostArk. Analyze it using our web application. Shoot. Please hold. "Antonio! did we do the PC app thingy? - No? Seriously?"
Okay, forget I mentioned that too.
Vision in the Dark
The flames make Ghost Ark easy to find in the dark. As soon as you turn your Ghost Arc on, an internal combustion system sparks our patented flame-vision setting. This feature doubles as hand warmers for cold climate investigating. Don't worry about the smoke and smell of burnt plastic. It's a feature.
Record your EVP at 6Hz
Oh, no. Not this again. Okay. So, as stated above, we're not really sure about the 6Hz or why 6Hz is the thing to do. But we got an email from the factory in china that says, "much audible by human ear." Ooh, I think we found a new tagline.
Much audible by human ear.
Triple Frequency Ghost Box
Because one or two frequencies, alone, is just silly talk we added a third. That's right, we're making serious strides in technology here, people. I mean, imagine having to carry THREE radios with you on an investigation and having them all run at the same time. That's ear-splittingly awesome, right?